Dealing with Worry and Anxiety

In the early nineties I was a computer professional working for EDS. They had an industry leading Phase II Systems Engineer Development Program that was very intense.  It was filled with technically difficult time-pressured assignments.  For example, we heard technical instruction all day long and then in the early evening, we would be given an assignment to create a large complex program flow chart or computer program that was due the next morning.  Hello! This was obviously going to take several, if not all, nighttime hours.  One time, I was in the office until 3AM trying to do an overnight assignment correctly and others were there even later or all night.  Of course, sometimes in the real computer world you are ‘on call’ and you do have to work through the night.  Any way, we averaged 80 hour training/work weeks for several weeks in a row. We were all drained and tested to the limits.  My co-employee roommate during that training, whom I had just met, was having difficulty keeping up with his assignments.  By the second week, he was vomiting in our apartment from the stress and worry of failing in Phase II.  A week later, he was out of Phase II training and EDS altogether.  My roommate experienced high stress, worried about outcomes, and experienced anxiety which led to unhealthy symptoms. That was a very challenging two months for all the employees in that training.  Praise God, I endured this and overcame the pressures I experienced.

Everyone has experienced some level of worry and anxiety. I’ll unpack these terms a little bit and then point to some practical and biblical help for coping with worry and anxiety. This blog entry is a highlight to the subject matter and not intended to be comprehensive in treating and coping with all forms of worry and anxiety.

Worry is mentally meditating on negative things, over and over again in your head, while dismissing positive things. You fret over tormenting thoughts. You dwell on bad things that did happen or could happen. If something already occurred, then no amount of worrying will every change that fact. If it’s something that could happen, it may never happen. Worrying, like fear, can be of something real or imagined.

It’s okay to have a realistic concern about someone or something. It’s okay to be concerned about danger. It’s foolish not to be. When you walk near a high mountain ledge then be concerned about falling. You should have a healthy fear in such a case because of the law of gravity and the sanctity of human life. If I notice an unusual non-round black spot growing on my skin I should be very concerned that it may be cancer and I should prayerfully see a skin doctor about it. It is not needless to be concerned about such a thing. It is a concern that needs to be addressed. But I don’t need to freak out and panic about it. I don’t need to run through many negative what-ifs in my head about it. When you swim in the ocean it’s okay to acknowledge the possibility of a shark bite/attack but thinking about it over and over again while you are in the ocean will have a negative effect on your experience. When I’m out there I do my best to never swim alone and I pray to God to help protect me. I admit though, the older I get, when it’s deeper than I can touch I have an increased nervousness about sharks so I shy away from those circumstances.

Needless worrying dwells on the negative which will hinder and hamper you and can even paralyze you in fear. Examples of needless worry: thinking regularly that there won’t be any Social Security money when you retire (Note: be a saver.); that you will get cancer one day and die (Note: invest in your health but getting cancer is often out of our control and not everyone who gets cancer dies from cancer); that the world will end soon; there is no world peace; something horrible will happen to me or my loved ones today; there are too many ants in the back yard, etc… Some issues are out of your control and some issues are not important. If there is a legitimate concern, then do something about it but don’t keep re-hashing and churning in your mind negative thoughts.

Needless worry is unhealthy and God’s Word teaches us to not do this (See below). Worry can become a sin issue when we don’t trust God and don’t have faith in God but instead wallow mentally and emotionally in negative thoughts and bow to unhealthy fears. Needless worry, like needless fear, is counter to having faith in God and living joyfully in Christ.

“It is distrust of God to be troubled about what is to come; impatience against God to be troubled with what is present; and anger at God to be troubled for what is past.”

Simon Patrick (1625–1707)

“If only we would stop lamenting and look up. God is here. Christ is risen. The Spirit has been poured out from on high. All this we know as theological truth. It remains for us to turn it into joyous spiritual experience.”

A. W. Tozer

Things to do when you struggle with worry:

- Identify what is worrying you.

- Distinguish between legitimate concerns and unhealthy/needless worries.

- Be mindful of unhealthy thoughts that won’t help you. Focus more on uplifting, joyful, truthful, hopeful, optimistic, and God-honoring thoughts.

- Don’t live by fear, instead, live by faith in God and enjoy His grace, mercy, and truth.

There are some additional helpful activities to try in this next section related to anxiety.

Anxiety is a heightened sense of nervousness and distress. Anxiety often occurs because one is living too stressed, too fast and/or too hard on their body. In some cases, anxiety is caused by some sort of fear. In other cases, it’s about eagerness and a strong desire or there is an apprehensive tension related to a mental/emotional health concern.

I experience some brief mild forms of anxiety from time to time like the night and morning before my son wrestles in a tournament or sometimes just before I preach. These are examples of normal anxiety that people experience: concern for my son’s safety and emotions as well as my upcoming public speaking moments. I want us to both do well and not mess up. Everyone experiences some general anxiety from time to time, but anxiety can also become something very unhealthy and wrong morally.

Anxiety and worry (as with stress) can have a negative impact on our emotional and physical well-being. Blood pressure can go high. Headaches can linger. Quality sleeping can decrease. Symptoms of depression can occur. There can be a panic attack of some sort which may have physical symptoms like an increased heart rate, dizziness, hyperventilation, trembling, or sweating.

When panic attacks continue and regularly occur then perhaps it is more of a disorder than a ‘small potatoes’ concern. The medical community recognizes multiples types of anxiety disorders. Some people who are overly anxious, especially on an ongoing and regularly occurring basis, could benefit from professional help like from a pastor, counselor, therapist, physician, and/or a psychiatrist. Sometimes medicines are used and can help, but mostly the help comes by way of modifications to the thought life, attitudes, and behavioral patterns. I also believe that faith in God and consistent holy living, based on God’s Word for His people today, are essential.

When addressing possible anxiety in one’s life, I like the twelve actions that Dr. Archibald Hart identified under the title ‘Personal Empowerment for Anxiety Sufferers (from his book, The Anxiety Cure; W. Publishing Grp. 1999, p50-51); written specifically for Christ-followers.

1.   Claim your strength in Christ.

2.   Feel the power that Christ gives you.

3.   Take control of your fear.

4.   Drop the ‘what ifs’ in life.

5.   Overcome your personal passivity.

6.   Increase your power by finding out all you can about your disorder.

7.   Don’t be demoralized by helplessness.

8.   Be compassionate toward yourself.

9.   Don’t let your problem dominate your life.

10. Beware the pitfalls of self-pity.

11. Find a good support group.

12. Never, never give up.

Also, consider these activities when dealing with worry and/or anxiety:

- Search God’s Word and apply relevant passages to your life and needs.

- Get an accurate diagnosis. Journal when the episode/experience occurs. Is there a common denominator among the occurrences? What precedes the anxiety? Was there a key event issue in your life that possibly led to the anxiety or are there ongoing stress issues or is there some kind of physiological issue in the body (in the mind, emotions, or physical body)?

- Identity and cope with any stress factors in your life. The subjects of worry and anxiety often overlap with the issue of stress. I have written about coping with stress in a separate blog entry (you can read that here: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2014/07/coping-with-stress.html). Some of the ways to cope with stress can help you cope with worry and anxiety.

- Seek out God-honoring wise counsel from others. You can receive help diagnosing your symptoms and causes and you can receive encouragement and accountability in coping with, enduring, and experiencing relief from various worries and anxieties.

- Admit anxiety and take personal ownership of your path to recovery.

- Learn about natural tranquilizers. For example, learn techniques for resting and apply them to your life. Learn to take it easy, slow down, relax, breathe, meditate (dwelling on God-honoring truth and thoughts). Enjoy some clean humor.

- Commit your fear(s) over to God.

- Give attention to helping/serving other people. Avoid a pre-occupation with yourself.

- If a Christ-follower, know that your identity is in Christ. What are the truth statements in Scripture about you (read this: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2013/09/identity-in-christ.html)? If you are not trusting Christ as your Savior and Lord then consider the great news of Jesus Christ as revealed in Scripture (read this: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2013/09/great-news-gods-plan-for-true-life.html).

- Listen to some uplifting music with God-honoring lyrics.

- Live one moment and one day at a time.

- Engage in some regular basic exercise and physical activity.

- Get some regular quality sleep. Learn techniques and tips to help you do this like sleeping at a similar time each day in a dark room and relaxing your thoughts and being careful what you eat and drink later in the day.

- Evaluate your diet related to unhealthy eating and beverages and any allergies and digestive issues. Make good adjustments and stick to consistent healthy habits.

- Get a regular dose of sunshine and fresh outside air.

- Take some time off from work and your regular routine to have some down time, recreation time, some enjoyment time.

- Understand your general purpose as a human being created by God to glorify Him (see http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2013/08/why-am-i-here.html). Also, seek to learn how God has wired you for life, for vocation, for helping others, etc…

- Consider how your own beliefs, thought patterns, and habits can cause anxiety.

- Evaluate the boundaries in your life so you are not engaged in too much activity too often or in wrongful things.

- Seek peace in relationships.

- Avoid alcohol, drugs, nicotine, and even caffeine (basically, avoid stimulants).

- Keep adrenaline to a minimum.

- Simplify your lifestyle.

- Count your blessings not your troubles! Have a God-centered attitude of gratitude. Listing in a journal on a regular basis all the many things you are thankful for and give God the glory.

- Don’t fuss about ‘small potatoes.’

Here are some relevant Bible passages on the subjects of worry and anxiety:

Proverbs 12:25 (ESV) Anxiety (worry) in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.

A ‘good word’ here can be affirmation and praise from another person or truth from God’s Word.

1 Peter 5:6-9a ESV Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, ⁷ casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you. ⁸ Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. ⁹ Resist him, firm in your faith,

Psalm 55:22 ESV Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.

Jesus warns people not to be anxious about the things of life but instead seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and your needs will be met.

Matthew 6:25-34 ESV “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ²⁷ And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? ²⁸ And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, ²⁹ yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ³⁰ But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? ³¹ Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. ³³ But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. ³⁴ “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

See also Luke 12:22-31

Matthew 13:22 ESV  As for what was sown among thorns, this is the one who hears the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and it proves unfruitful.

Luke 21:34 ESV But watch yourselves lest your hearts be weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness and cares of this life, and that day come upon you suddenly like a trap.

Mark 13:11 ESV  And when they bring you to trial and deliver you over, do not be anxious beforehand what you are to say, but say whatever is given you in that hour, for it is not you who speak, but the Holy Spirit.

John 14:27 ESV Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

Colossians 3:15 ESV And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.

Psalm 56:3 ESV When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.

Realize that God is sovereign and that we are responsible for aligning our lives with God’s will for us.

Job 12:10 ESV In his hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all mankind.

Acts 17:24-28 ESV The God who made the world and everything in it, being Lord of heaven and earth, does not live in temples made by man, ²⁵nor is he served by human hands, as though he needed anything, since he himself gives to all mankind life and breath and everything. ²⁶And he made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, ²⁷that they should seek God, in the hope that they might feel their way toward him and find him. Yet he is actually not far from each one of us, ²⁸for “‘In him we live and move and have our being’;as even some of your own poets have said, “‘For we are indeed his offspring.

1 Chron . 29:11-13 ESV ¹¹Yours, O Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the victory and the majesty, for all that is in the heavens and in the earth is yours. Yours is the kingdom, O Lord, and you are exalted as head above all. ¹²Both riches and honor come from you, and you rule over all. In your hand are power and might, and in your hand it is to make great and to give strength to all. ¹³And now we thank you, our God, and praise your glorious name.

John 14:1 ESV “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.

Jeremiah 17:7-8 ESV “Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD. ⁸ He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.”

1 Peter 1:16 ESV  since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”

Gal. 5:22-25 ESV But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. ²⁵If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.

And my favorite passage for encouragement with life’s issues:

Phili. 4:6-8 ESV Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ⁸Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

What are your thoughts about what I wrote and included here about dealing with worry and anxiety? How do you deal with worry and/or anxiety?

Mike

Coping with Stress

Stress is some factor that causes something in our body to be tense, to feel pressure. In some cases there are good stress factors and at other times there are negative stress factors we should avoid, diminish, and/or remove. Who hasn’t been stressed? You can’t totally eliminate negative stress from ever happening in your life, but you can learn to cope with stress in a God-honoring way so it doesn’t rule you, rob you of joy, or destroy you.

We actually benefit from some stress factors. For example, weight lifting can stress your body, mind and emotions. Proper regular weight lifting, for many people, can help burn calories, develop strength and muscle tone, but if you engage in ‘improper’ weight lifting (e.g lifting too much, too often, and in bad form) it will lead to problems like injuries. Another common example of good stress is reasonable academic requirements. For each college class the student is given due dates for graded assignments. This causes some pressure in the student’s life to be prepared and turn assignments in on time in order to achieve a desired grade. Such academic stress is good and can help motivate one to do well in a timely manner. The stress can become overwhelming though when the student overloads their personal schedule, becomes too busy, doesn’t get enough sleep, and/or procrastinates with assignments.

Most of the time when we think of stress it’s about the unpleasant stress issues in life. Over the years, I have been stressed about many things like my personal insecurities, bullies, financial debt, unemployment, illnesses, failure, relational conflict, being late, burning dinner, fast-paced/over-extended living, and on and on.

Such stress can lead to negative consequences.  Perhaps one’s health declines, there are feelings of panic, foolish decisions made, withdrawal, symptoms of depression surface, loss of self-control, anger issues, etc... In my twenties, a young adult co-worker of mine was so distraught and stressed over his girlfriend breaking up with him, he went to the hospital because his physical heart was in pain. Last summer, I worked lots of extra hours remodeling the home we were soon to move into. I was not sleeping much and was over-extending myself and stressing out about running out of time. When I became very irritable with my family, began losing my focus, and not making good decisions I realized (and my wife called me out about it) that I needed to slow down and rest more. I was doing too much and it caused lots of stress which negatively impacted my family as well.

We must realize that we are limited as created human beings. We are not God. We are not supreme beings. We are not unlimited in ability and capacity. We must be careful not to overextend ourselves too much or too regularly. Our bodies need down time. We need self-care time. We need slow times and restful times. We need recovery times. We can’t and shouldn’t take on too much.

Here are some biblical passages to help you cope with stress:

Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer! Ps. 4:1 ESV

Pray to God for help, for relief.

Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! Ps. 46:10 ESV

Slow down and focus on God. So often in our culture we are overly active and busy and this leads to much stress. Let’s slow down regularly to commune and connect with the Lord God Almighty.

 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Mt. 11:28-30 ESV

We can experience holistic rest for our lives in Jesus Christ.

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Rom. 12:2 ESV

Renew your thoughts time and time again with God-honoring thinking and living.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ⁸ Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philip. 4:6-8 ESV

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33 ESV

Don’t be anxious or worrying about things. Pray to God for help and be thankful to God; then comes God’s promise of peace and protection in Christ. Remember to live by and think with a Christian worldview. Be careful about what you see, watch, listen to, expose yourself to and fantasize about.

Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation. Ps. 42:5 ESV

Don’t allow stress to beat you down with discouragement. Trust God and put your hope in God.

Here are some biblical and some practical ways to cope with stress:

- Diagnose the situation; is the stress factor out of your control, not important, or is it something important that can and should be changed?

- Pray to God about what to do.

- Search God’s Word and apply relevant passages to your life.

- Seek out God-honoring wise counsel from others. You can receive help diagnosing your symptoms and causes and you can receive encouragement and accountability in coping with, enduring, and experiencing relief from various kinds of stress.

- If a Christ-follower, know that your identity is in Christ. What are the truth statements in Scripture about you (read this: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2013/09/identity-in-christ.html)? 

If you are not trusting Christ as your Savior and Lord then consider the great news of Jesus Christ as revealed in Scripture (read this: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2013/09/great-news-gods-plan-for-true-life.html).

- Engage in some regular exercise and physical activities.

- Evaluate your diet related to unhealthy eating and beverages and any allergies and digestive issues. Make good adjustments and stick to consistent healthy habits.

- Get a regular dose of sunshine and fresh outside air.

- Have your thoughts dwell on God-honoring things instead of unholy and negative things.

- Take some time off from work and your regular routine to have some down time, recreation time, some enjoyment time.

- Learn when to say ‘no’ to people and busyness.

- Evaluate the boundaries in your life so you are not engaged in too much activity too often or in wrongful things.

- Seek peace in relationships.

- Keep adrenaline to a minimum.

- Don’t rush into major decision making, especially when stressed.

- Simplify your lifestyle.

- Avoid alcohol, drugs, nicotine, and even caffeine (basically, avoid stimulants).

- Get some regular quality sleep. Learn techniques and tips to help you do this like sleeping at a similar time each day in a dark room and relaxing your thoughts and being careful what you eat and drink later in the day. 

- Consider how your own beliefs, thought patterns, and habits can cause stress. For example, being perfectionistic, thinking failure is always bad, and checking your body weight every day will cause stress.

- Count your blessings not your troubles! Have a God-centered attitude of gratitude. Try listing in a journal on a regular basis all the many things you are thankful for and give God the glory.

- Don’t fuss about ‘small potatoes.’

- Learn about the many possible stress factors in life; determine which ones are present in your life and address them.

Know the difference between a tension to balance verses an issue to remove. For example, working many hours a week for earned income compared to spending quality weekly time with my wife and children is a tension to balance and manage. This is not an issue to remove from my life. I am not going to only work long term or only spend time with my family long term. I plan to do both long term so I need to find a balance between them. If however, I stepped on a splinter piece of wood that drove into my foot I would want that splinter removed. I don’t want long term balance between keeping a splinter in my foot and walking with a limp. The splinter is a problem I want removed from my life soon and hopefully after some recovery time I can walk normal again and without the pain.

Stress is not inherently sinful. I believe Jesus Christ was feeling very stressed in His humanity the night before He went to the cross because of spiritual warfare and He knew that He would suffer greatly for our sins, especially being separate spiritually for a time from God the Father. He experienced great stress but He did not sin. In our lives, if we are stressed and tempted, for example, to try to control matters instead of giving control to God, or to not have faith in God, or to develop insecure fears, then the stress issue becomes a moral issue.

Recognize that there is a difference between feeling some stress over something and being ‘stressed out’ about something. The latter includes worry, anxiety, panic, and frantic emotions. Everyone feels negative stress from time to time but don’t allow the stress to control you, defeat you, and lead you to things that are not God-honoring. In this blog entry, my focus is coping with stress and in a separate blog entry I write about dealing with worry and anxiety (read that entry here: http://mikesmorals.blogspot.com/2014/07/dealing-with-worry-and-anxiety.html).

When you are stressed about something, consider and apply some of these biblical and practical ways to cope with stress. Ultimately, continue to give your concerns, cares, and your life over to Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord.

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. ⁷ Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. 1 Pt. 5:6-7 NLT

and he (Christ) died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised. 2 Cor. 5:15 ESV

What are your thoughts about what I’ve written and included here about coping with stress? How do you cope with stress? 

Mike