Mike's Morals: patience

Showing posts with label patience. Show all posts

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Fuel & Medicine for the Soul; Hope

There was a time when I hoped I would get my own driver’s license and drive on my own; when I hoped I would graduate from college with a BS degree and then later on with a Masters degree; when I hoped I would marry a wonderful woman; when I hoped I would travel to another continent on a missions trip; when I hoped I would be able to father a son and daughter. The list goes on of various hopes I’ve had in my life and the examples above have come true and there has been great joy in them.

Hope, in general, is an expectation of something good to happen in the future (Rom. 8:23-25). One child said this at bedtime, “Now I lay me down to rest; I hope to pass tomorrow’s test. If I should die before I wake, that’s one less test I have to take.”

I asked one of my sons out of the blue, “What do you hope for?” His answer, “My own smart phone and a new car.” I can relate since I’ve hoped for such things at various times in my life. And that’s how we are about hope at times, to some degree; that we want better things that we think will make us happier and/or our life better. People may hope in many things; certain achievements to happen, certain relationships to come to fruition or improve, a bigger house and better automobiles, the dream bucket list items to check off, and the like. It can be okay to have hope toward such things, for God-honoring reasons, but there are greater things to hope for.

“Hope looks for the good in people instead of harping on the worst in them. Hope opens doors where despair closes them. Hope discovers what can be done instead of grumbling about what cannot be done. Hope draws its power from a deep trust in God and the basic goodness of mankind. Hope "lights a candle" instead of "cursing the darkness." Hope regards problems, small or large, as opportunities. Hope cherishes no illusions, nor does it yield to cynicism.” Unknown author

Some people are desperate for hope and are clinging to hope by a thin margin. Perhaps, there has been the death of a loved one, or life is deteriorating quickly, or there are very difficult circumstances and sufferings being experienced. Fortunately, there is always hope in God for the living (people, that is).

In contrast to hope, there are feelings and thoughts of despair, hopelessness, gloom and doom, and a sense of nothing good to look forward to. This is no way to truly live and this is not how God wants us to live.

The psalm writer of Psalms 42-43 was deeply discouraged (i.e. despondent: downcast, downhearted) about something but chose to hope in God.

Psalm 42:5 ESV Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation

Abraham was promised by God to be the father of many generations but as Abraham became quite old, around 100 years old, without children, he must have wondered when and if he would ever have kids. But his hope was in the Lord and the promises of God because Abraham believed what God promised would come true. Abraham had hope in God and His promises regardless of his circumstances.
Rom. 4:18-23 NLT Even when there was no reason for hope, Abraham kept hoping—believing that he would become the father of many nations. For God had said to him, “That’s how many descendants you will have!” ¹⁹And Abraham’s faith did not weaken, even though, at about 100 years of age, he figured his body was as good as dead—and so was Sarah’s womb. ²⁰Abraham never wavered in believing God’s promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger, and in this he brought glory to God. ²¹He was fully convinced that God is able to do whatever he promises. ²²And because of Abraham’s faith, God counted him as righteous. ²³And when God counted him as righteous, it wasn’t just for Abraham’s benefit. It was recorded
See also Rom. 4:17, 23-25

Hope is the physician of every misery. Irish Proverb

The Holy Bible teaches that God is the God of hope (Rom. 15:13). And as we believe Him and trust Him day by day you and I can grow in God-centered hope. God is amazing and does the amazing. He creates something out of nothing. He does the impossible. He saves that which is lost. He says things will come to pass and they do come to pass. There is no greater power, love, source of hope and reason to hope than God.

“When you say a situation or a person is hopeless, you're slamming the door in the face of God.” Charles L. Allen

Here are some more key Bible truths about hope.

Jesus is referred to as the Blessed Hope and our hope (Tit. 2:13, 1 Tim. 1:1) because He is the Creator, Savior, and Lord and source of eternal life and the source of abundant life (Titus. 3:7, Col. 1:5, John 10:10m John 10:28, Heb. 12:2). He gives His redeemed a living hope (1 Pet. 1:3-5). By God’s grace through faith in Christ one can have eternal life, true life. This is our greatest hope, a hope for eternal life in Christ and for God’s intended life for us now.

“The resurrection of Jesus Christ is our hope today. It is our assurance that we have a living Savior to help us live as we should now, and that when, in the end, we set forth on that last great journey, we shall not travel an uncharted course, but rather we shall go on a planned voyage—life to death to eternal living.” Raymond MacKendree

The Bible teaches there are some who have no hope (because they are separate from Christ, from God).

Eph. 2:12 ESV remember that you were at that time separated from Christ, alienated from the commonwealth of Israel and strangers to the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world. ¹³But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far off have been brought near by the blood of Christ.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

God-honoring Decision Making

We all have decisions to make constantly in our lives, some small, some big, and some more important than others. As a Campus Pastor at the world’s largest Christian university, I have many students asking me for help in making life decisions. They want to know which major to declare, which vocational path to pursue, which options to choose regarding internships, whether or not they should marry their significant other, etc.. I find myself sharing a model of God-honoring decision making that I have used over the years.

My wife and I made some big decisions ourselves recently regarding my change of employment, our relocation, and transitioning from living in a parsonage house to renting a house to buying a house. We are God-fearing people who try to make God-honoring decisions and we need help going about it. When it comes to decision making I do my best to look through a biblical lens as a born again Christ-follower. I walk through the following eight steps like a road map for God-honoring decision making and maybe you can benefit from them as well.

1) Pray to God (& fast), trusting Him throughout the process.

2) Seek relevant knowledge and understanding.

3) Seek biblical-based discernment.

4) Seek wisdom from God, His Word, & God-honoring people.

5) Analyze and compare information/options.

6) Wait on the Lord, be patient.

7) Ask God for increased living faith in Him.

8) Go ahead, when the timing is right, make the decision for the glory of God.

1) Pray to God (& fast), trusting Him throughout the process.

Prayer may seem cliché among some folks but it’s absolutely necessary. Christians should be praying to God not just to get help with our requests but to cultivate our spiritual intimacy with God, to grow our spiritual lives, to show our dependence on God, and to worship the One and only true God, our Savior and Lord.

Praying to God is vital in our relationship with Him and in making God-honoring decisions.

Ephesians 6:18a ESV praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication.

Phili. 4:6-7 ESV do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

James 5:16b NLT The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

Be a student of prayer. Keep learning about prayer from God’s Word and engage regularly in prayer, including planned quality moments as well as spontaneous moments throughout your day and night. Pray specifically as the Lord leads. Saturate your life and decision making processing with God-honoring prayer.

Example statement prayers: God, show me whether or not I should be looking for a different job. God, reveal to me any red flags in your eyes about this job offer before me now. God, clarify in my heart if this is the person that I should propose marriage to and commit to in marriage the rest of my life.

Be careful about hindrances to effective prayer like unconfessed sin (Ps. 66:18) and praying amiss with the wrong motives (Jam. 4:3) and not praying according to God’s will (1 John 5:14).

Since I often associate fasting for spiritual purposes with prayer, consider going without food (or another important item in your life) to grow your spiritual hunger in God and the things of God showing God that you are serious about Him hearing your prayers and answering them, all for His glory. I have fasted many times over the bigger decisions in my life and it helped grow my dependence on the Lord and grow closer to Him.

2) Seek relevant knowledge and understanding.

Clarify and define the actual decision you are facing and then gather key information.

Knowledge is about facts, data, and information. Do research, learn, and gather knowledge related to the subject of your decision. If you are deciding whether or not to ask a person to marry you then don’t just waste time with him or her doing and talking about trivial things. Ask questions and observe things that are pertinent to the possibility of you spending the rest of your life together as a married couple. For example, Where do you see yourself in 5, 15, 20 years? What are the things that you highly value in life? What are your spiritual beliefs? Who is Jesus Christ to you? How has God wired you for ministry and vocation? What are you passion about in life? How would you describe marriage? Do you want to be a parent? If so, how many kids would you like to have and why?

Ask yourself, what important knowledge is needed related to the decision that needs to be made? Ask others what you should be learning and understanding in relation to your decision. Perhaps you can communicate with someone who has made a similar decision before.

Keep your scope of research relevant to what’s helpful in making the decision and realize that you don’t need to know everything to make a decision. As you gather relevant knowledge organize it and order it according to priority. Seek to understand relevant knowledge that can be useful to you in the decision making process and in moving forward once you make the decision.

Some of the relevant knowledge you should be gathering may relate to how God has wired you for life, work, and ministry for His glory. For example, What spiritual gift(s) has He given you? What talents, skills/abilities do you have? Strengths? Weaknesses? Your personality? Experiences?

Be curious. Ask a lot of questions. Ask God in prayer to help you gather relevant knowledge and understanding for your decision at hand.

Proverbs 10:14 ESV The wise lay up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.

Proverbs 2:6 ESV For the LORD gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding;

I’ll write about wisdom in a separate step. For now, concentrate on gathering relevant knowledge and seeking to understand that knowledge and what has value to you.

3) Seek Biblical-based discernment.

What I mean by discernment is being able to distinguish between right and wrong and deem what is worthy in the eyes of God and what is not. God’s Word contains truth from God that provides us a moral compass in life. When it comes to decision making, if God’s Word declares something is wrong in His eyes then don’t chose sin, don’t chose to go against God’s Word and will for you.

If you are considering a job opportunity with a higher paying job living in a more preferable city, but the employer has a reputation of unethical practice then say no. If you are a single maturing Christ-follower and wondering if you should date a nonbeliever you are attracted to, don’t date this person. I’ve done this before. It’s the wrong decision.

Don’t compromise when it comes to biblical principles for God’s people today. Obedience to God is essential. Even Jesus emphasized submission to the will of God the Father (Mt. 6:10, Lk. 22:42).

Bible verses related to discernment:

Hebrews 5:14 ESV But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.

Romans 12:2 ESV Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Ephesians 5:10 ESV and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord.

See also Prov. 14:8, 1 John 4:1.

Here are some other principles to consider related to discernment:

Be a person of God-honoring integrity (Prov. 10:9, 22:1).

Honestly consider warning signs (Prov. 10:17, 27:6).

Learn from past decisions and experiences. Do you have a pattern of behavior and decision making that is not good? Learn from past mistakes (Prov. 26:11). Redeem failures for good.

Be careful about your association with evil and wrongdoing (1 Thess. 5:22).

If you have doubts on whether something is right or wrong then don’t do it until God impresses on your heart more clarity of spiritual conviction (Rom. 14:21, 23). When in doubt, leave it out.

Consider your heart motives regarding the potential decision. Honestly assess them (Eccl. 8:5, Prov. 15:28).

Be careful about being blind and naïve by your emotions and facts. You may be looking to change jobs because your current job is difficult and you want relief from that so you think the ‘grass is greener’ at a different employer. The truth is that other place of employment is not a perfect place to work and there are no perfect employees. God may want you to endure where you are to develop and grow you and to minister to others through you.

Sometimes you have a choice and neither choice is a sin. In such cases, God gives you some freedom to make a decision. You can be in His will with either choice as long as you are seeking to honor Him with your life.

4) Seek Wisdom from God, His Word, & God-honoring people.

Wisdom is a combination of knowledge, understanding, and application of valued truth in one’s life. Wisdom is information of value applied to your life.

Here’s a simple example of practical wisdom at work. There is some solid knowledge out there that consuming a lot of calories and not being very physically active will cause most people to gain weight and become less healthy. I’m in my late 40s and find this sort of information valuable in my life as I enjoy comfort foods and I’m exercising less than when I was younger. The wise thing to do is to eat and drink healthier more consistently and only consume the junk food stuff occasionally as special treats and I need to be physically active regularly. This is wisdom and when I actually apply such valued knowledge to my life I’m being wise.

We all lack wisdom. We all need wisdom. Thankfully, God generously gives wisdom to those who ask Him for some (in faith; Jam. 1:5-6; Prov. 2:6). God-honoring wisdom can come directly from God like by way of the Holy Spirit but often comes from God through His Word and through people, especially God-honoring people.

Psalm 119:105 ESV Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

Prov. 19:20 ESV Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.

Prov. 1:5 ESV Let the wise hear and increase in learning, and the one who understands obtain guidance,

See also Prov. 13:20, 2:1-15, 16:16, 3:21-22.

It’s wise to consider first what’s important to God then consider what’s important to you. Search the Scriptures for wisdom. What can you learn from God’s Word related to your decision at hand? What does God’s Word reveal related to your decision?

Consider your overall purpose in life and the spiritual implications of your decision. Seek to know God better and better as your Savior and Lord, become more like Christ in character and in conduct/mission, and glorify God. How will your decision affect your spiritual life and impact the lives of others? Christ followers are salt and light in Christ in this world, ambassadors for Christ, instruments of righteousness. Consider how you can make a greater impact on advancing the kingdom purposes of Christ.

If God’s word is silent in relation to your decision at hand then offer up your God-honoring desire before the Lord. Ps. 37:4 ESV Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

This verse doesn’t mean God gives us everything and anything we want. Our desires need to line up with His will and His glory. This is more likely to happen when you are consistently submitting your life to Christ and are filled with the Holy Spirit. God cares about the desires of your heart when you are delighting in Him, glorifying Him, and depending on Him. God blesses God-honoring desires.

Seek wise counsel from others. There are times when we need someone else’s help in processing the different aspects of a decision to be made whether a second opinion or an expert opinion. Consider God-honoring leaders in your life. Perhaps a local church pastor, a parent, a teacher or coach; someone to help you confirm and/or remove some inclinations and doubts you have. I have reached out to many people over the years for wisdom; like my wife, dad, mom, pastor, friends and co-workers in ministry. You need sound God-honoring advice not just something said that you want to hear. And of course, if you are married, your bigger decisions should be discussed and processed together.

5) Analyze and compare information/options.

(i.e. cost/benefit analysis, pros & cons, + & -, strengths & weaknesses)

When I make bigger decisions I like to analyze and compare relevant information by comparing the positives and negatives related to the decision. This usually includes two columns on a paper or in a table in a word processor program. One column includes the factual and perceived positive things if I make a certain decision. The other column includes the factual and perceived negative things if I make a certain decision. My wife and I did this before we committed to buying our current house. First, we compared staying in our rental house to relocating and buying a house (via mortgage). When we moved forward looking for a house to buy, we found two prospective houses that rose to the top of our list and we did a comparison analysis between the two. And when we became very interested in one particular house then we created a strengths and weaknesses comparison related to our decision on whether or not to move forward in buying this particular house. Here’s a shortened example of the strengths/weaknesses comparison:

House/Property Strengths	House/Property Weaknesses
4^th sleeping area bedroom space	Lots of traffic/road noise
Bedford County; lower taxes than Lynchburg city	Distance to work and church is 10 miles one way; further/longer than we are used to or prefer
Long, fairly flat, large fenced-in back yard	Carpet in sleeping areas includes many stains, and is very worn beyond repair
Newer roof; windows on top level; Vinyl siding	Paint, clean up needed in sleeping areas and elsewhere in house

The list was a lot longer than this but hopefully you get the idea. I believe analyzing and comparing information/options is a wise thing to do in decision making especially regarding bigger decisions. These types of exercises help give you a realistic picture of your options and potential decision to make. They help you more honestly assess if the weaknesses can be lived with or improved upon and if they far outweigh the strengths in the long run.

Proverbs 14:15 ESV The simple believes everything, but the prudent gives thought to his steps.

Christ commended analyzing, planning, and counting the cost in decision making (Luke 14:28-32).

Consider outcomes and risks. Prioritize, examine, and evaluate the information you have gathered.

6) Wait on the Lord, be patient.

Most bigger decisions in life don’t require an immediate response. You usually have some time to make the decision and time is often needed before making a big decision.

Waiting on the Lord, being patient, enduring, and longsuffering are all God-honoring qualities. Patience is a fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22) for born again Christ-followers. God wants and expects His people to be patient, not to impulsively act hastily and foolishly. Often, hasty decision making brings negative consequences (Prov. 21:5).

Be cautious about the lure of ‘instant gratification.’ We often want things soon when waiting is often God’s plan for us.

Also, recognize that many things are out of our control; for example, waiting for a prospective employer to get back to you after the first interview. You could follow up and show some persistence but you also have to learn to give some things time. You have to learn to be patient. Having more time can allow you to spend more time on the steps of God-honoring decision making. God also will use time to develop us and our dependence on Him. God knows what’s best for us so we should wait on Him to lead us in decision making.

Psalm 25:5 ESV Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.

Ps. 27:1 ESV Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!

See also Isa. 40:28-31, Heb. 6:15, Prov. 18:13, 19:2.

7) Ask God for increased living faith in Him.

A student once came to me asking for some counsel about deciding between two good paths after he graduates. And I asked which would take greater faith on his part; staying here for graduate school and student leadership ministry or raising money and ministering God’s Word in England in a public school setting. The latter takes more faith and it’s the latter the student chose. I think God is more pleased with such a decision because greater faith is needed in moving forward to the England ministry and God is pleased by our faith in Him.

Hebrews 11:1, 6 ESV Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. 6 And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.

Christ sent out His disciples two by two to do some traveling ministry and told them to take very little with them; only a staff, no bread, no bag, no money, no second tunic, but to wear sandals (Mark 6:7-9). Christ wanted them to live by faith for basic provisions while on this mission trip. He noted in the passage that some people they encountered would be hospitable and others would not. Christ wanted to test and strengthen their faith as they stepped out of their comfort zones to minister in His name. So, He took away everything they might depend on other than the simple clothes on their backs, the sandals on their feet, and the staffs in their hands. God would ultimately be their provider for everything they would need to fulfill for what they were sent to do.

There is a saving faith (trusting faith in Christ as your Savior) and there is a living faith (trusting Christ to be the Lord over the life). With great living faith in Christ you will depend greater on Christ and experience diminished fears and insecurities in your flesh.

Ask God to increase your faith in Him. Luke 17:5 ESV The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!”